Tag Archives: Gay

Day 44: Why do chinese twinks dress up gay?

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I notice lot’s of chinese people everywhere – and there are a disproportionately higher number of chinese twinks around me given that I work in a university – who by most American standards would be considered gay. This is not in their mannerisms but in the way they dress. I saw a couple today and I swear to God, I couldn’t make up which was the guy and which was the girl. I guess this is where Singapore’s metrosexuality has led it to – to complete unisexual identity. Many kids dress up rather wierdly – very pronounced hair color, really tight fitting t-shirts, often very revealing tank tops, sometimes with even eye liners. Also, common is the caesar cut hair style – which I have seen in so much profusion only in American gay Bars.

Just when you think that they are gay, they will prop up a girl in either side and start making out. Perhaps the error lies in approaching fashion with prejudices in mind. For example, In India, it is quite common for men to walk holding hands. Of course, it is fast running out of fashion as a ‘gay awareness’ spreads through the middle class. Also, just out of necessity, it is quite common for men to share rooms and even beds in many cities, so it is in general not considered inappropriate to have some body contact, as long as it is the right parts that are touching 😉 I see guys racing along in motorbikes with the guy at the back tightly hugging the person in the front – and THIS IS NOT GAY! In the states, you would think twice about putting your arm around your buddy. Perhaps the western society is getting too sensitive about the whole gay thing.

I’m curious to see how the whole gay scene is like in Singapore. I just learned today that Grinder and Jacked are huge hits here as well – big shocker 😉 Sex somehow has a way of breaching cultural and linguistic barriers 🙂 If anyone has an idea of how to go about being gay in Singapore, do let me know….

Day 29: Why do gay people have so much sex?

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In many parts of the world, being gay is equivalent to being sexually indiscriminate and promiscuous. In my experience, gay people do have a lot of sex. It would be a very interesting study to see if lesbians have more or less sex compared to the gays in any given community.

I thought that this was a myth about gay people as well – I remember a joke that some one once told me:

What is the ideal second date gift for a Lesbian couple?

A moving truck.

What is the ideal second date gift for a gay couple?

Nothing – there is no second date.

No matter how progressive the world is today, being gay is not easy. If you are bicultural and one of those cultures is old and conservative like mine, then being gay is not just ‘not- easy’ but also hard. In America, I had gay friends whose parents were supportive. They had other gay friends, they did gay things, went to gay bars and in general had an entire ‘sub – culture‘ that they could easily fit in. Even then, I did notice that my gay friends had few straight friends, that they did not hang around with straight people as much as with their gay friends. Also, straight people everywhere make gay jokes. Period.

In cultures such as mine, there is no such thing as a gay ‘sub – culture’. If you are gay, you tell no one. You may find other gay people, some would be your friends, but with most you’ll just have sex and never meet again. You live like a straight guy for the most part and when you are with your other friends, you make jokes about girls and their boobies, just like every body else. In most cases you may even get married, have straight sex and have kids. (No comments on the quality of sex though)

It’s very interesting to notice how gay people function in these taboo societies. I’m talking about mine now – thing are different in different countries.

You see someone. Normally if you are walking, you would glance at someone and then look else where. Sometimes if you are in a good mood,  you may smile or say ‘good morning’. If you are gay, and the person opposite to you is also gay, then this glance lingers for a fraction of a second longer than it should. Seeing that the other person is not taking his eyes away, you would be emboldened to stare a bit longer and vice versa. Then you walk past each other – you do look away briefly, or else you would trip and fall. But once you are past each other, then both of you turn back and look again. A signal has been sent – We are   open for sex.

This is the basic principle of a gaydar – in any society. This gaze – gaze – turn back and gaze mechanism.

What happens next is a function of many factors. Are you busy? If yes, then just walk away – if you are an ‘advanced gay’ then you may stop and exchange phone numbers and arrange to meet later. If not, then you would remember this incident, later when you are in your room, take out your dick and masturbate imaging how things may have turned out.

If you are not busy and the other person is not busy, then you both may wanna have sex right away. Perhaps, you got out of your house expecting sex. Perhaps not.

Sometimes you may stop – you may have a place, perhaps he does. Then you go there and do it. Sometimes no one has a place – some people prefer public restrooms, some prefer public gardens or park. In general, the gaydar of each place is calibrated to automatically zoom in on a place which is ‘gay friendly’.

In my culture, people would not expect to go any further from here. You can be friends with each other (highly unlikely, people you meet on the streets are simply driven by sex and that includes you) but then what you would talk about? There are no gay clubs to hang out with, no ‘gay things’ to do and so on. You will simply end up fucking each other all over again.  Maybe you guys have other gay friends, then you’ll end up trying three somes and gang bangs. Then please do use protection.

Some times you may meet some one and fall in love – but then I wish that you’d rather not – Love is tortuous as it is, and a gay romance in a conservative culture is a sure recipe to getting hurt. So don’t fall in love.

Let me get back to my main question – why are gay people promiscuous?

1) If it is a culture like mine, then what else will they do? They will simply end up having sex. This process  – gazing, gazing, turning back gazing – can be thrilling after a while. You’ll want to do more people. It’s like alcohol or smoking, just damn hard to say no to.

2) Gay people are men. It’s so much easier for men to have sex if they wanted to. Society (especially conservative societies) do not allow a lot of opportunities for men and women to be together in intimate settings. But men and men, they are always together – locker rooms, restrooms, gym, playground and so on. They watch porn together, get intoxicated together – so two people can easily meet and have sex. It’s a lot safer and more acceptable than to find a girl and get her to have sex with you.

3) Sex is good – but new sex is better. This is true in general, there are also promiscuous straight people. (Big shocker!) Everybody loves the thrill, the excitement leading up to sex with a new person. I haven’t have sex with the same person regularly to be able to write authoritatively about regular sex, but I know enough to know that given the chance everyone would wanna have sex with someone hotter than whoever he or she is with – it’s just animal nature. Raw sex appeal. Don’t get me wrong – there are faithful people – they may stray in their minds given the chance, may fuck behind a bush, may watch porn. Or else you could deeply be in love with your partner – even then you do not violate the former rule – love makes your lover hot and no one comes close to that.

4) Society does not wholly approve of gay romance. I know may people in America – my friends who want to find that ‘someone’ and spend their lives together. Many of these people have their playboy time, when they simply fuck around. They may settle down later. And start looking for that someone. But more people ch0ose to stay single and have sex – in any gay club, you’ll find that set of old people who will grind against you – they are those people. Many gay people like the idea of having sex with men, but at their hearts cannot truly endorse the idea of man and man living together and raising children. They may claim that it is ‘boring’ – but what they are saying is that they don’t get it. They have grown up seeing their parents – mom and dad – have loved their moms, may be gay but men nevertheless and may consider themselves unprepared to raise kids. For some, settling down is a blow to their manhood – doesn’t it mean that you have to kiss each other good night and call each other ‘darling’ and ‘sweetumps’ and show up for the office christmas party together? Plenty of people cannot do that – they may prefer dicks to chicks but beyond that is no different from your average football loving beer drinking dude. They would rather be cared for than take care of someone else.

5) It’s all sex baby – the simply pure animalistic joy of sex. Gay people have tasted it, some like myself too early in their youths perhaps not entirely of their own choice – but like a tiger cub tasting human blood for the first time, the taste linger until your claws come out, ready for your next prey…